No More Downplaying: Period

I have a real issue with acknowledging my achievements and talents in my life.  Self-doubt has always been such a big problem for me.  It’s almost as if I think that I don’t deserve whatever it is I accomplished or my God-given talents.  Take my recent weight loss as a prime example.  I have lost over 30 pounds in the past 11 months.  That’s a big freaking deal by anyone’s standards.  But to me, seeing as though it took me damn near a year to do this, it wasn’t good enough.  My thinking was that I should have lost more in that time.  I belittled all the hard work, sweaty workouts, sore muscles and hours of meal planning I put into the process.  None of that shit was easy or fun to do, trust me.  So why do I continue to do this to myself?  I think it’s because no matter how far I may have come; I always see how far I still have to go.  Even though I have lost over 30 pounds, I tend to mostly focus on the weight I still have left to lose.  For me, this isn’t exclusive for just my weight loss.  This has translated to most of the things I have achieved and to my goals.

I have a tendency to downplay MOST if not all of my accomplishments and talents.  And it’s totally not a, “I’m trying to stay humble” thing. It’s more of a, “I sort of did it, but damn I still have so much farther to go” thing.  See the problem?  Often times I can’t pat myself on the back for doing something that I worked really hard to do.  Some things that even people who know me wish they could have done.  That’s the very thing I have been told a few times by several different people  They say this in regards to my recent weight loss and also about the things that I have written that they have read.  But since I’m nowhere I want to be and in my mind, “still have so far to go” it means almost nothing.  Career-wise, I’m nowhere close to where I want to be either.  My career goal is to be a full-time author.  To be more specific, I want to write fiction books for adults and children.  I have been doing the biggest step of all to achieve this goal and that is to simply write.  The more writing one does, the better they become right?  The negative side of my thinking always says this step isn’t shit if no one has read what I have written. But regardless of how small, it’s bringing me closer to my goal of being on the New York Times Best Sellers List.  I have been writing much more than I have been in the past few years, which is a bit of an achievement in itself.  I have been submitting my poetry to different publications and have gotten published.  That’s a big one because (as per usual in my mind) my work isn’t all that great.  SIDEBAR:  I received my first professional review of a poem I wrote.  The critic wrote that my poem was, “the first piece I return to after a long day of work to find my calm.”   Cool huh?!

For someone who doesn’t know anything about me to say that my poem was one of her top three favorites in the anthology, has to speak to my writing abilities.  I have to really start training my mind to believe and know that I have a talent for writing.  I must start giving myself credit for continuing to go after my dreams.  Whatever effort I’m making (big or small) it is getting me closer and closer to the finish line.  And I should celebrate every victory with an enthusiastic pat on the back.  I am starting to learn to accept the fact that I am the shit for even making a serious effort to accomplish anything.  The person I was a few years ago would never have attempted the things that I have recently. I think that the downplaying I still do sometimes is a bit of the old me that reside inside.  She always has something less than stellar to say.  Who knows, she may always live in the small relics of my mind.  But I can’t let her or anyone else put a damper on my accomplishments, talents, dreams or goals.  Last Thursday I had the pleasure of going to see an R&B band that I love called, “The Internet.”  I had the privilege of getting some sound advice from one of the members named Matt.  I told him that I was a writer and a future New York Times Bestselling author. Speak it into existence right?  I told him that most times I am filled with so much self-doubt I can’t see how I will accomplish my dreams. I also let him know that despite that, I know that I’m a damn good writer.  But that I have trouble remembering that all the time.  He told me that that sort of thing happens to most people, but that I had to keep positive thoughts always.  I have to be my biggest supporter no matter what.  And that I should always know that anything is possible no matter how impossible it may seem.  I knew all those things before he said them to me.  And I have thought them myself before.  But to hear them from someone whom I just met, and is a fellow artist like me put them into a direct perspective this time.  Thank you, Matt, for putting everything back into perspective for me with your wise words.

So what am I going to do to improve this pointless, negative behavior?  I’m going to start focusing on what I actually did to accomplish the goal.  If someone actually compliments me on an achievement I reached or even notices the effort given, I will sincerely take the compliment.  I will start looking at how far I’ve come as opposed to how far I still have to go.  With my writing, I will pay more attention to writing quality blogs people can relate too rather than obsessing about getting my views numbers up.  If I write good stuff and stay consistent, they will come.  It’s all comes down to how I look at things and what I focus on.  If I (and you) continue to look at how far we still have yet to go, then not only are we downplaying our achievements but we are slowing down our progress.  And trying to achieve anything is challenging enough, why add more unnecessary crap to that?  And above all of that, I truly have to remember this:  I AM THE SHIT.  Period.  I’m good at what I do.  Writing is my God-given talent.   And I have been blessed with the strength, drive, and hunger to get anything I want in this life.  So from this moment on, I’ll do my best to only look at how much I have progressed in my journey.  My advice is not to let a setback (or what you perceive as small steps) keep you from patting yourself on the back for a job well done.  Know that you’re doing your best and you too are the shit.  If you don’t think that you’re killing it at working toward your goals, then you won’t be.  And again, who needs that unnecessary crap on their minds?

 

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Who’s Assuming Who?

(Disclaimer- I proofread this post a dozen times and used Grammarly to help. If you see any mistakes, I’m only human. And I am not perfect. Thanks for reading!)

Last week I posted a blog post called, “Dear Scared White People” that received mostly positive comments.  But three people took issue with the title… (Insert dramatic music here) without having read the post.  On the Facebook blog post, one woman said, “I am not a sensitive woman, but the title of your post turned me off.  I am just being honest. While I am sure it is all in good humor, I wouldn’t click it.”  Although she said that she wasn’t a “sensitive woman”, the fact that she felt a strong emotion to just the title tells me she is.  I promptly let her know that I wasn’t trying to be humorous.  I told her that the post wasn’t directed at ALL WHITE PEOPLE.  I have the where with all to know that not ALL WHITE PEOPLE behave in the manner in which I was speaking of in my post.  I go on to explain that the title is directed at the so-called “scared” ones.  The second person left a comment that said, “Wow racist to a T.”  (Insert the emoji with the person with their hand over their face.)  The sheer ignorance and cluelessness of that person didn’t surprise me one bit.  And the third person said it was, “terrible click bait” and “kind of offensive, too.”  He went on to say that it was a “terrible assumption to make with the title.”  He continued by saying, “The way you’re approaching, what I would assume is an important matter based on other comments here, is terrible.  You’re projecting an assumption of an entire racial class.”  To which I responded, “So from your statement, I can tell that not only didn’t you read the post to find out exactly what and whom I’m talking about.  You didn’t even read all the comments posted here by others.  You are ASSUMING you know what I’m talking about based solely on the title.  The exterior.  So don’t say I’m projecting an assumption when clearly you are doing the same.”  After addressing all three (politely I might add) what do you think happened?  Absolutely nothing.  Complete radio silence from all three, just as I expected.

By their comments, I feel, they clearly fit the narrative of people making assumptions about certain things without learning the truth.  It piggybacks a little off last week’s post about people calling the cops on people of color because they made assumptions about them.  The assumptions being who they think these people are or what they think they may do.  Let me be very clear here:  ALL HUMANS make assumptions about others at one time or another.  (Raises hand…..I’m guilty of this.)  I have a friend named Kevin that I have known for ten years now.  When I first met Kevin, I didn’t think we would have anything in common.  He listened to different music, he wore Insane Clown Posse tee shirts and he wasn’t the friendliest looking guy.  I made assumptions about him based on what I saw and nothing else.  Fast forward to now, and he’s one of my dearest friends.  I’ll be attending his wedding next summer.

I developed inaccurate and stupid opinions about people.  Most of which were truly unwarranted and unfair.  The one that I used to make was if a particular white person I encountered would be racist.  These thoughts stem from interactions I had while growing up black in America.  I’ve been followed around a store while shopping on a few occasions.  Sometimes I’m still nervous that someone thinks I may steal from a store just because I’m black.  I’ve heard things said like (insert their idea of a compliment here) for a black girl.  And the infamous, “You’re different than other black people.  You’re not like them.”  I’m still not sure how to process that last one.  The fact that I have encountered a few bad apples in the bunch is in no way an excuse for me to think all white people are racist.  But I wanted to give you some context as to where my thoughts came from.

As I stated above, we all make assumptions.  We assume that we will not like the taste of certain foods because of the way it looks or smells.  We assume that we won’t like a movie because of reviews it received from our family or friends.  We assume that the title of a post is “terrible click bait” without knowing that the person titled it that way to convey an important message.  And we assume that a whole race of people are bad because we have heard things or had an unpleasant experience with someone of that race.  Assumptions get people in a lot of unnecessary trouble.  So take the time to dig a little bit further beneath the surface before you project your own thoughts onto a situation.  Who knows?  Maybe you’ll make a new friend you thought you wouldn’t have anything in common with.  Or maybe, just maybe, you learn something you didn’t know about yourself.

Dear “Scared White People,”

(Disclaimer- I proofread this post a dozen times and used an online site to help. If you see any mistakes, I’m only human. And I am not perfect. Thanks for reading!)

Dear “Scared White People”,

Hi. My name is Nyikia and I am a concerned black woman.  I’m writing this letter to you because I’m growing quite concerned (and getting pissed off) by your recent behavior toward black people.  I have listed a few examples:

1.) Calling the cops when black people are waiting for our friends in the local Starbucks. (Happened in Philadelphia.)
2.) Calling the cops when black people gather peacefully in the park to have a BBQ with friends and family. (Google BBQ Becky.)
3.) Calling the cops when black people are going to view a house that is for sale. Even though the person is a real estate agent, and had been authorized to do so.
4.) Calling the cops when black people check out of an Airbnb (with their luggage in full view) because you thought they might be burglars.
5.) Calling the police on a 9-year old that was just buying something at the local corner store because you think they “grabbed your butt.” (Google Corner store Caroline)
6.) Calling the police because a black father was cheering his son on during his soccer game. (Google Golf cart Gail)

I’ll stop here because the list goes on and on with your less than stellar behavior.  If you notice from the list, there is a consistent pattern.  That pattern is the calling of the police on people who don’t look like you.  Why is that?  I could understand if they were doing something that was suspicious.  But clearly, in the instances listed above, they were not. The suspicion you had was based merely on the color of their skin.  And also, the prejudices you have acquired over the years.  Now I understand that your prejudices could stem from a learned behavior passed down from generation to generation.  And some have come from outside sources:  literature, television, hearsay and most notorious the media.  I’m really trying to work with you “scared white people,” I really am.  But at a certain point in life, you have to take inventory of yourself.  Not everything you see and hear about people is true.  Even the cheeto in chief (aka our current realty star president) knows this.  Hence the term his administration loves to overuse, “fake news.” Although in his case most of what we hear about him turns out to be absolutely true.  But that’s a post for another day.

Let’s get back to the task at hand.  I understand having a little concern for the unknown. Dark places, stray animals, emails from strange addresses and yes our fellow humans.  I grew up in the 80’s with McGruff the Crime Dog, so I learned all about stranger danger. But the one thing McGruff never taught us was to be afraid of someone based solely on their skin color.  If you asked the average child today to describe someone that frightens them, I’m pretty sure a stranger’s skin color wouldn’t come up.  Unless of course, they were taught that type of racial bias in the home.  So why is it children are wiser in this regard than most adults?  I work with children for a living, and I notice that they have a tendency of seeing people for exactly who they are.  Race not included.  When they judge you, they judge you on your merits.  Race not included.  When they are leery of someone, it is because of the vibe they get from the person.  RACE NOT INCLUDED.  Children are usually both open and eager to get to know someone who is different than themselves. They ask questions without assuming they know the answer.  Children just see a person much like themselves with zero prejudgments.

So why haven’t adults learned to do this already?  For people who are older and intellectually smarter, we sure lack the intelligence of the average child.  I’m going to take this time to let you in on something you should have already figured out:  NOT ALL BLACK PEOPLE ARE BAD PEOPLE.  That is shocking right?  I know the truth can be most times.  But I feel you really need to know and understand that fact.  Let me be clear here, there are bad people in every race, gender, and country.  Being a bad person is not relegated to a racial thing.  It’s a personality and behavioral thing.  If I went around thinking certain things about certain races, then my belief right now would be that all white people are racist.  And clearly, that is not the case.

I have a suggestion on how to help you “scared white people” in working through your prejudices.  Provided you actually want to get rid of your judgmental nature and possibly make a few new friends.  BE OPEN.  Get to know more about the black people that you encounter in your everyday life.  That sounds like a lofty task, but it can be made easy. You can simply start by saying, “Hello.”  Easy enough right?  Have a real genuine conversation with that co-worker that you see all the time.  Get to know them on a level that’s based on common ground, common interest and a humane level.  You’ll be surprised at how much you’ll have in common with the average black person.  Everyone has that one family member that they don’t like in their family.  You avoid them at all costs at family functions until another relative asked you if you said hi to them.  You can easily bond over that.  Or how you love your kids to death, but could sometimes punt them like a football when they get on your nerves.  You can’t always judge a book by its cover.  You have to pick it up, read the description on the back or inside cover in order to learn what it’s about.  And the same goes for people.  All I’m saying is get to know someone who’s different than you before you judge them.  And for the love of God:  STOP CALLING THE POLICE.

With all love and sincerity,

Nyikia

 

Resting Bitch Face: It’s Real

(Disclaimer- I proofread this thing a dozen times and used an online site to help.  If you see any mistakes, I’m only human and not perfect.  Thanks for reading!)

According to Urban Dictionary.com, the formal definition for Resting Bitch Face is:  “A phenomenon in which the resting face lacks animation and appears to look bitchy at all times, thus leading people to believe a person must be upset, a snob or a bitch.”

I am a sufferer of this misunderstood facial phenomenon.  Thinking back on it for the majority of my life, I had absolutely no idea!  I would get the usual questions like, “What’s wrong with you?” or “Who pissed you off today?”  Or worse I would hear later that comments were made about me to others basically saying that I looked bitchy and “unapproachable.”  I wanted to say to them, “This is just my face.”  Who knows how many dates or hangouts I missed out on because someone was afraid to talk to me.  Who knows how many times someone may have looked at me and thought I was an angry person that would kick their ass in a minute.  Now to be completed honest and fair, back in the day I was not always the nicest person in the world.  I had what some would describe as a “bad attitude” and I was a bit of a “Debbie Downer.”  And I take full responsibility for that.  But I’m a totally different person from who I used to be.  I worked really hard to be a happier person for myself and toward others around me.  But do you know for all that work I did, I STILL have Resting Bitch Face?  Smh….

On a brighter note though, having Resting Bitch Face probably kept me from having a lot of unpleasant experiences.  So that’s good!  I feel like I shouldn’t be solely judged because I’m not walking around smiling 24/7.  Who the hell does that?  You know damn well if I did, people would think that I was either high or crazy.  Before when I saw someone sitting alone minding their own business smiling for seemingly no reason, I would have definitely been leery of them.  I would have more than likely thought to myself, “Is that person up to something?  They are smiling way too hard over there and they’re sitting alone.  I better get out of here.”  I know it isn’t right, but that’s what I would have been thinking.  Deep down in my mind, everyone is the potential killer/ rapist.  Weird thinking I know, but hey it has kept me alive and well so far.  I attribute this to watching and listening to far too many true crime shows and podcast.  But seriously though, it’s perfectly ok to be cautious.  But I was judging someone in the way that others judged me. And that isn’t right.

I currently work as a Teacher’s Assistant for a living until my successfully (and very profitable) writing career takes off.  I have to say children never think I have Resting Bitch Face.  Not that they would know exactly what that is, but they don’t judge me on my lack of a happy facial expression.  They usually just see another person that they can talk too about whatever is on their minds.  Children are extremely comfortable around me. I even have children in public places start talking to me without any motivation from me to do so.  I once had cute little girl start a conversation with me in a ladies line bathroom.  I’m sure to the adults around;  I may not have looked like I was interested in talking.  But she didn’t see that.  She saw a person that she wanted to talk to about her Little Mermaid shoes her mother bought her.  And that was the best.

Since I’ve discovered that I suffer from RBF, I do my best to be mindful of it.  Sometimes though, I can’t help it.  I get lost in my own thoughts of things I have to do or want to do. And my facial expressions (or lack thereof) get away from me.  That doesn’t make me not a nice person or unapproachable.  It just means I have a lot of things on my mind at that given time.  So next time you see someone who may suffer from Rest Bitch Face, don’t judge them too quickly.  There may be nothing at wrong with them at all.  For all you know, they could be thinking about how much they really want a taco.

Downplaying your accomplishments: Stop that shit

I have a really big issue with accepting my achievements in life.  I’m not exactly sure why this has become such a big problem for me.  It’s almost as if I think that I don’t deserve whatever it is I accomplished.  Take my recent weight loss.  I have lost 32 pounds in the past 11 months.  Now that’s a big freaking deal by anyone’s standards. But to me seeing as though it took me damn near a year to do this, it wasn’t good enough.  I have gained, lost, gained and then lost again.  I belittled all my hard work, sweaty workouts, sore muscles and hours of meal planning.  None of that shit was easy nor fun, trust me. So why do I continue to do this to myself?  I think it’s because no matter how far I may have come, I always see how far I still have to go.  Even though I have lost 32 pounds, I tend to mostly focus on the weight I still have left to lose.  For me, this isn’t exclusive for just my weight loss. This has translated to most of the things I have achieved.

I have a tendency to downplay MOST if not all of my accomplishments.  And it’s totally not a, “I’m trying to stay humble” thing. It’s more of a, “I sort of did it, but damn I still have so much more ahead of me to do.”  See the problem?  Often times I can’t pat myself on the back for doing something that I worked really hard to do.  Some things that even people who know me wish they had done.  That very thing I have been told a few times by several different people regarding my recent weight loss.  But since I’m not where I want to be and in my mind, “still have so far to go” it means almost nothing.  Career-wise, I’m nowhere close to where I want to be either.  But I can honestly say I’m damn sure not as far as I used to be.  I have been taking steps that are putting me toward the right direction.  The negative side of me always says that these are small steps, nothing major.  Regardless it’s bringing me closer to my goal of being a full time writer and a New York Times Best Seller.  I have been writing much more than I have been in the past few years, which is a bit of a goal in itself.  I have been submitting my poetry to different publications and have gotten published.  That’s a big one because (as per usual in the small part of my mind) my work isn’t all that great.  SIDEBAR: I received my first professional review on a poem I wrote. She said that my poem was the first piece she returns to after a long day of work to find her calm. Cool right?!

For someone who doesn’t know anything about me to say that my poem was basically one of her top three favorites in the anthology, has to speak to my writing abilities.  I had to really start training my mind to believe and know that I have talent.  I had to start giving myself credit for continuing to go after and achieve my goals.  Whatever effort I’m making (big or small) it is getting me closer and closer to the finish line.  And I should celebrate every victory with enthusiasm.  I started learning to accept the fact that I am the shit for even making a serious effort to accomplish anything.  I’m doing something currently that the old me would have never attempted.  And I’m kicking ass at it.  Slowly, but hell I’m still doing it.  I think that the self-downplaying I do is still a bit of the old me that lives inside.  She’s always got something less than stellar to say.  Who knows, she may always live in the small relic part of my mind.  But I can’t let her or anyone else put a damper on my accomplishments.

So how do I do this?  I do this by mainly focusing on what I actually did to accomplish the goal.  The step by step process that I did to make it happen.  If someone actually compliments me on a goal I reached or even notices the effort given, I sincerely take the compliment.  If someone else notices something I’m doing, then I have to be doing good right?  Yes, I am.  So I hold onto that as tightly as possible.  I also look at how far I’ve come as oppose to how far I still have to go.  With the weight, I can’t exactly see the difference physical yet, but I can feel the difference.  Worse come to worse, the scale lets me know I’ve made progress in my weight loss goals.  With my writing career, I pay more attention to writing quality blogs people can relate too rather than obsessing about getting my audience numbers up.  If I write good stuff and stay consistent, they will come.  It’s all comes down to how you look at things and what you focus on.  If I (and you) continue to look at how far we still have yet to go, then not only are we downplaying our goals but we are slowly down our progress.  And trying to achieve anything is challenging enough, why add more unnecessary crap to that?  And above all of that I truly had to remember this:  I AM THE SHIT. Period.  I’m good at what I do. Writing is my God-given talent.  And I have been blessed with the strength, drive and hunger to get anything I want in this life.  So from this moment on, do your best to only look at how much you have progressed in your journey. Don’t let a setback (or what you perceive as small steps) keep you from patting yourself on the back for a job well done.  Know that you’re doing your best and you too are the shit.  If you don’t think that you’re killing it at working toward your goals, then you won’t be.  And again, who needs that unnecessary crap on their minds?

Dear “Scared” White People

(Quick Disclaimer:  This is not about ALL WHITE PEOPLE,  just a chosen few.  Once you read it, you’ll know exactly who I’m talking too.)

Hi. My name is Nyikia.  In case you haven’t already figured out by my name, I’m black woman.  A black woman to be specific.  I’m writing this letter to you because I’m growing quite concerned (and a little-pissed off) by a lot of your recent behavior toward black people. I have listed a few examples:

1.) Calling the cops when black people are waiting for our friends in the local Starbucks.
2.) Calling the cops when black people gather peacefully in the park to have a BBQ with friends and family.
3.) Calling the cops when black people are going to view a house that is for sale.  Even though the person is a real estate agent, and had been authorized to do so.
4.) Calling the cops when black people check out of an Airbnb (with their luggage in full view) because you thought they might be burglars.

I’ll stop here because the list goes on and on, with your less than stellar behavior.  If you notice from the list, there is a consistent pattern.  The pattern of calling the police on people who don’t look like you.  Why is that?  I could understand if they were doing something that was suspicious.  But clearly, in these instances, they were not.  The suspicion for you was merely the color of their skin and the prejudices you have acquired over the years.  Now I understand that your prejudices have come from a learned behavior passed down from generation to generation.  And some have come from outside sources:  literature, television, hearsay and most notorious the media.  I’m really trying to work with you “scared white people,” I really am.  But at a certain point in life, you have to take certain inventory of yourself.  Not everything you see and hear about people is true.  Even the cheeto in chief (our current play president) knows this. Hence the term his administration loves to overuse, “fake news.”  Although in his case most of what we hear about him keeps coming up true.  But that’s a post for another day. Let’s get back to the task at hand.

I understand having a little concern for the unknown.  Dark places, stray animals, emails from strange addresses and yes our fellow humans.  I grew up in the 80’s with McGruff the Crime Dog, so I learned all about stranger danger.  But the one thing McGruff never taught, was to be afraid of someone based solely on their skin color.  If you asked the average child today to describe someone that frightened them, I’m pretty sure a stranger’s skin color wouldn’t come up.  Unless they were taught that in the home.  So why is it children are wiser in this regard than most adults?  I work with children for a living, and I notice that they have a tendency of seeing people for exactly who they are. Race not included.  When they judge you, they judge you on your merits.  Race not included.  When they are leery of someone, it is because of the vibe they get from the person.  RACE NOT INCLUDED.  Children are usually both open and eager to get to know someone who is different than themselves.  They ask questions without assuming they know the answer.  Children just see a person much like themselves with zero prejudgments.  So why haven’t adults learned to do this already?

For people who are older and intellectually smarter, we sure lack the intelligence of the average child.  I’m going to take this time to let you in on something you should have already figured out:  NOT ALL BLACK PEOPLE ARE BAD PEOPLE.  That is shocking right? I know the truth often times can be.  But I feel you really need to know and understand that fact.  Let’s be clear here, there are bad people in every race, gender, and country. Being a bad person is not relegated to a racial thing.  It’s a personality and behavioral thing.  If I went around thinking certain things about certain races, then my belief right now would be that all white people are racist.  And clearly, that is not the case.

I have a suggestion on how to help you “scared white people” in working through your prejudices.  Provided you actually want to get rid of your judgmental nature and possibly make a few new friends.  BE OPEN.  Get to know more about the black people that you encounter in your everyday life.  That sounds like a lofty task, but it can be made easy.  Simple start by saying, “Hello.”  Easy right?  Have a real genuine conversation with that co-worker that you see all the time.  Get to know them on a level that based on common ground, common interest and friendship.  You’ll be surprised at how much you’ll have in common with the average black person.  Everyone has that one cousin that they don’t like in their family.  You avoid them at all costs at family functions until another relative asked you if you said hi to them.  You can easily bond over that.  Or how you love your kids to death, but could sometimes punt them like a football when they get on your nerves.  Often times can’t judge a book by its cover.  You have to pick it up, read the description on the back or inside cover in order to learn more about the topic.  And the same goes for people.  All I’m saying is get to know someone who’s different than you before you judge them.  And for the love of God: STOP CALLING THE POLICE.

With all love and sincerity,

Nyikia

 

Why do black people die in scary movies when in reality we don’t investigate shit?

In the majority of scary movies where there is a black actor in it, rest assured they are dying at some point.  And sometimes before the credits even roll!  To me it makes absolutely no sense what so ever.  I’m not saying this because I am black, I’m saying this because it is a fact.  Not for nothing but when have you ever been around a black person, heard a strange noise and had them say, “What was that? I’m going to go check it out.” Never. At best you might get a,”What the hell was that?”  We know that whatever the hell that noise was, it’s a good indication that we need to go in the opposite direction.  I remember one time when I was a teenager hearing a loud bang in the middle of the night coming from the kitchen.  It woke me up out of my sleep and I wasn’t sure what to do.  Do I check and see what it is or pray for the best and take my black behind back to sleep?  Seeing as though it was only my mother, my little brother and I in the house at the time, I chose to do what people do in movies….. I went to investigate. Now mind you, I only did this because my little brother was in the house and I felt it was my job to protect him.  If he weren’t home and it was just my mother and I, she would have been shit out of luck cause I would have run off and left her to fend for herself if someone was in the house.  Ha! Ha!  Just kidding, but I digress.  I get up and grab this super huge wooden post I kept near my bed.  I quietly opened my bedroom door and peaked out.  I looked in on my brother whose room was just to the left of mine, and then I headed down the hall to the kitchen.  I had that bed post perched on my right shoulder like a baseball player ready to hit the home run to win the World Series.  I get to the end of the hall which is the entrance of the kitchen and turn the light switch on.  I was fully prepared to do some serious damage to someone.  I discovered that the dishes that were left in the rack had somehow fallen into the sink.  I never felt so relieved in all my days.  I say all this to say, for the most part we (black people) don’t investigate anything unless a loved one maybe in danger.  And how many times have you come across a scary movie where the black person in it goes to investigate a noise to protect a loved one?  Hardly ever!

Comedian Cedric the Entertainer has a joke where he says that if there are a group of black people standing together and one of them takes off running, we all running.  He said we don’t have to know why we are running, we are just running.  Then he ends the joke by saying, “Man, why was you running?”  And the other guy answered, “I thought somebody was coming.”  Ha! Ha!  Obviously whatever is going on over there is none of our business and we are out of here.  Now don’t misunderstand what I’m saying.  I’m not saying black people are a bunch of punks who can’t defend themselves.  We will kick ass if that’s what needs to happen.  I gave an example of me willing to do just that.  But in the movies where they are boogie men, human killers, ghosts and supernatural things, we are running.  We are getting as far away from that situation as the legs God gave us will carry us.  So Hollywood, if you’re going to cast black people in your scary movies please take note.  Black people sense danger, recognize the danger and we leave the area immediately.  We are not noisy enough to die like the characters you cast us in scary movies to be.  We don’t investigate sh*t.